A Well-Oiled Conspiracy to Destroy Me

I'm applying for this internship at MIT and due to what appears to be a well-oiled conspiracy, I won't succeed in making the deadline. First, I gave Culpepper the form for the recommendation, and she procrastinated for three weeks. Last week her daughter got in a car accident and she is now gone indefinitely. As if that was not bad enough, something is wrong with the college board website, so I can't print out a copy of my SAT scores. There's absolutely no hope whatsoever. The world hates me.